I teach Junior High and it is my casual
observation that Jr. High is a brutal place; which coincides with my memories
of Jr. High. Do not misunderstand me, I enjoyed Jr. High. It’s just that I was
a badly behaving pill who failed to consider the feelings of those who traveled
the halls of my little world with me. I lived in a world that revolved around
me, my wants, and my desires. Now that I’m older I can better hide the more
misanthropic urges that frequently vie for control of my mind. I do not think
the current crop of Jr. High students is any worse, or better, than we were.
Age and experience tend to scuff off our more negative behaviors, leaving us
better able to interact with those on our shared journey. Additionally, I now
look back on fifty-four years of life and that changes things. Now as I talk
with my students I marvel at the breathtaking simplicity of their decision
making and judgement.
Most of my students view the world in
simple black and white with no shades of gray. Their view, one of youth and optimism,
varies greatly from mine. They enjoy the luxury of few seriously grievous
errors. Most, though not all, raised in observant Christian families have yet
to endure either great private failure or deep personal tragedy. Cocooned in a
carefully orchestrated world, they rarely rub elbows with those who differ or
embrace a divergent world-view. In some ways they enjoy swimming in a
homogeneous sea, one where all the reefs are carefully marked, the tides
checked, and all sharks de-fanged. They can afford to be quick to judge. And so
they do, heedless of what such judgments portend.
The view back from fifty-four is quite
different. I look back over a path strewn with mistakes, errors in judgment, bouts
of selfishness, and moments of compromise. I clearly remember thinking ill of
those whose lives were marked by personal failure, detours into self-absorption
that visited hurt and shame on those around them. Then, a few short years
later, I found that my life also skewed off glide-path into the tall trees. I
discovered that sin lurked just ‘round the corner, waiting in the shadows for
an opportune moment. Through painful experience my own weakness became apparent
to all near me. Soon the wreckage of poor personal choices cluttered my road. I
could ill afford to point an accusing finger. Now all I could do was to slink
into the rear and hope that no one noticed my presence. But God has yet a
different view.
Much to my great joy, God views me through
the lens of His son. While I look back in chagrin and shame, He looks back at
the opportunity to show grace and compassion. My mistakes are His
opportunities. My failures are His victories. My deep and secret shame is His
full and abounding joy. He did not turn me out or take the opportunity to humiliate
me. Rather, He took all the sorrow and sin and bent it into something new,
something grander and better than I had ever conceived. Casting all my sins as
far as the East is from the West, He forged a bright future out of the dark
slag of my then present. So now His reality colors how I see my past, present
and future.
So today, when my students say or do
things that cause me to cringe, I take comfort in God’s reality. I rest easy in
the surety of His marvelous ability to make old things new. And even though
they roll their eyes when I tell them, I remind them to be gracious with one
another, to be kind in word and deed, to make room for those who they think are
odd or mistaken about one thing or another. I share with them the fact that
when they arrive at the ripe old age of fifty-four they will be very glad for
God’s grace and how it has worked in His reclamation project of their lives.
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